First Run, Then Eat.
Using Positive Reinforcement to Smooth Out Bumps in Your Day and Maintain Momentum
I run for many reasons. I run for my health, my sanity, the opportunity to get outdoors…but I also run to eat.
And even with all of these very good reasons to lace up my running shoes and get out the door, without the eat, I’m not sure I would do the run. I love that it affords me some extra calories. I often hate the run when I start, if I’m lucky my mind wanders and I stop hating the run so much.
Toward the end of the run, I start to think about the eat…and that makes me so happy. Correct order is so important, Eat then Run, would just never work and probably lead to Nap. Fail.
Pure Behavioral Magic
First/Then is my favorite reinforcement strategy. It’s pure behavioral magic.
The First/Then strategy is based on the Premack Principle which states that “the probability of a less desired activity increases if it’s followed by a more desired activity.”
Which makes sense, right?
I forget to use this strategy as much as I should with my little guy, but I use it with my big kids all the time:
First, clean your room...Then, I’ll drive you to your friend’s house
First, unload the dishwasher...Then, you can watch television
First, peas…Then cookies
Unfortunately, this is probably the only way I get my big kids to do most anything these days.
With my little guy, it works a bit differently. He is still learning to understand what we say, and he’s able to express even less. Then there’s that pesky 2 year-old temper that flares quickly, leaving little time for reason.
My Little Guy in His “Swim Costume”
This summer while swimming at the neighbor’s pool, they had an assortment of chips out for the kids. It was a roasting 98 degrees and I figured my little guy would go straight to the pool in his full swim costume (long sleeve swim shirt, long shorts) and floatie, which he did, until he saw the chips.
I knew denying the chips with their beauty and ease of access would only end poorly, so I put a handful in a cup and he was in heaven.
As his face grew redder in all that swim attire, I worried he was getting too hot. He approached me for a second serving and I told him, “First Swim, Then Chips.” I said it, while anticipating the blow back from a now hot, angry and hungry little blond monster.
To my surprise, he walked into the pool! Whoa, it worked! This stuff never gets old.
Even in all my years in the field of ABA, I still forget to use this powerful strategy, kind of like the plumber who always has a leaky toilet. My little guy did return in about 3 minutes looking for more chips, but whatever, not sure many of us can resist the power of a can of Pringles.
How can you use First/Then?
Use Less Language
“What I love most about First/Then is how well it adapts to children of so many abilities.”
You can use less language, you can use more, you can use just language, or you can use a visual. A visual can be a simple laminated sheet with two boxes, one for First and one for Then, you can use picture icons or write in the words. For kiddos that need some help while in the community, keep some index cards in your glove box so you can write it out on the fly.
Remember that the simpler the language, the better. We parents often feel the need to talk a lot and explain ourselves to our kids, but they only hear a fraction of what we say and key words are so important.
Be a Broken Record
First/Then’s are also repeatable. If your child does not like the First/ Then deal you have set, keep repeating it calmly. Show them you mean business and don’t waiver. Hopefully, they will eventually submit. If not, you may want to consider the difficulty of your First and the reinforcement value of your Then. For example, First homework/ Then cookies for a kiddo who just had a snack might not work. Instead consider First homework/ Then iPad.
Everyday Examples
First Shoes, Then Outside
First Lunch, Then Cookie
First Brush Teeth, Then Watch Show
A great way to really understand the power of this strategy is to identify ways you use it in how you structure your day. We go to work for a paycheck, the work always comes before the paycheck.
First clean house, then relax by the pool
First mow the lawn, then go on a bike ride
As you motor through your day, think of all the ways you apply this principle to help you get through the work and get to the fun. First peas, then cookies.
Simple, yet so incredibly powerful.
Have any First/Then experiences you’d like to share? I’d love to hear about them!